Second ultrasound

We went for our second ultrasound today.  Our little one is measuring 6 weeks 2 days, which is just 3 days behind where I am at.  That is perfectly normal since there is a +/- 4 day variance on early ultrasound measurements.  Also, the tech only did one measurement of little one, so there is a larger margin of error.  More importantly, we were able to see our little one's heart beating away.  Heart rate was a nice strong 105 bpm.  She said this was right on track for where I am at in this pregnancy. 

We also met with the RE (it was R's first time meeting her).  She seemed very optimistic and said that the risk of miscarriage went from 30% to less than 10%.  She said it could be even lower due to my age, but she likes to be more cautious.  She gave me some advice for my constipation and nausea and said that I can go back to Dr J (my OB).  She also said that going on the camping trip in a couple of weeks would be fine, but that I need to be able to get to a hospital if I were to start bleeding.  I still need to research and see how far the campsite is from a hospital.  I stopped by Dr J's office on my way out and scheduled my first OB appointment for a week from today.

Without further ado, here is the latest pic of little one:

- J

Baby's first camping trip

We got back from our Memorial Day camping trip yesterday.  It wasn't our normal Macthoy trip.  We weren't up to going that far and I didn't want to be that far from a hospital in case there was an issue, so instead we went camping with the band. 

We went to a campground in the mountains by North Bend.  The campsite itself was beautiful, but the drive there was awful.  There is a logging road that you have to go down to get to the campsite and it is not maintained at all.  3-4 miles of the road was just potholes.  The group site that we reserved was not as big as we thought it would be, so cramming all of the tents in there was a challenge, but we made it work.  Also, there was another site directly next to ours, which was a bit of a problem.  There wasn't a lot of privacy.  But the views of the mountains and the sounds from the river were stellar. 

Unfortunately, the weather was not great.  The first night it poured and was really cold, which flavored the rest of the trip.  The firewood got all wet so starting a fire was nearly impossible which meant that there was no shot at all of drying out.  The next day there was some sun and overall it was more enjoyable, but it was still pretty cold.  By the time Sunday rolled around, everyone decided to cut the trip short a day and go home.

There is another camping trip coming up in a couple of weeks, but I am not sure if I am going to go.  I am leaning towards not at this point.  It is further away, and I am just not sure how I feel about being away from a hospital.  Also, I felt like people were annoyed by having to avoid smoking near me.  I kind of felt like I was an inconvenience and people would have been happier if I had not been there.  Plus, Pickles was really not enjoying herself.  On the other hand, the site is supposed to be gorgeous, and the weather should be much better.  I am going to talk to my doctor tomorrow and see what she thinks.

Which brings me to the most exciting yet nerve-wracking part of this.  Tomorrow I go in for another ultrasound.  I am praying that little one is okay and we get to see a nice strong, healthy heartbeat tomorrow.  R wasn't at the first appointment where I saw the heartbeats for the twins, so I am excited for him to be there with me tomorrow.  I am praying that it goes well, so that he can have that experience with me. 

Wish us luck!  I will post more tomorrow.

- J

6 Weeks!

6 weeks today!  I am thrilled to be at this point.  I am feeling much better today and I think a lot of that has to do with taking another test this morning and getting a really dark line.  I know it's a little ridiculous, but I couldn't help it.  Anyway, here I am at 6 weeks.  Woohoo!

We are going camping this weekend, which should hopefully be a lot of fun.  I am a little nervous about the weather and the bears.  They have been spotted in the area and it is cub season, so I hope we don't run into any angry mama bears.  I am also a little nervous about avoiding people's cigarette smoke and not giving away our secret.  We'll see what happens I guess. 

Weekly Check In:

• How far along?: 6 weeks

• Total weight gain: They didn't weigh me last week, so I have no idea.

• How big is baby?: Little one is the size of a sweet pea today!  R asked me the size this morning and when I told him he said "of course little one is a sweet pea, but what size is it?"  I thought that was really cute.

• Maternity clothes?: I have pretty much made the conversion to maternity clothes or sweats full time at this point.  They are comfortable, and I am only slightly ashamed.

• Movement: Still way too early.

• Stretch marks?: Just the ones I already had.

• Sleep?: I think I am starting to get used to being exhausted.  I am still worn out all of the time, but I seem to be better able to cope with it.  I think I have been sleeping a little better too.  If not, I am used to tossing and turning all night as well.

• Symptoms?: Exhausted, heartburn, heightened sense of smell, frequent urination, gassy, constipated, very mild nausea, and really vivid dreams.  I am still loving each and every symptom.

• Food cravings:  Fruit and veggies are still good, but I have also been craving hot dogs lately.

• Belly button in or out?: Still an innie.

• What I miss: Still missing the ability to have a normal bed time.  I am also missing coffee at this point.

• What I'm looking forward to: Our next ultrasound on the 31st!  Here's hoping we see a perfect, healthy heartbeat.

• Best Moment this week: Telling our parents.  Everyone was thrilled and so excited.  It was great to be able to surprise them that way.

• Milestone: This week, little one's brain is continuing to form, as are it's arms and legs.  Blood is pumping through it's little body, and eyes and nostrils are starting to form. At this point, little one has a pancreas and an appendix.

- J

Effects of Lovenox, dreams, and other musings...

I feel like there are a lot of emotions building up in me right now that I need to get out, so this will likely be a bit of a rant.  First off, I have to show off my Lovenox bruises.  They are pretty impressive if I do say so myself. 

 Now, on to the rant.


I am starting to overanalyze things again.  I am guessing that this is going to be the way it is throughout this pregnancy, but it is starting to drive me crazy.  Yesterday morning, I felt confident and secure in the fact that I am pregnant.  But as the day progressed, the fear and doubt started to creep in.  I am terrified that my LO has died and I won't know until my next ultrasound on the 31st.  That is such a long time to wait.  Again, I have no reason to believe that this is the case.  I am still having symptoms, and if anything my fatigue has gotten worse.  I am starting to feel like some of the symptoms are getting a little bit better, but I actually think that maybe I am just getting used to them.  I had a dream last night that we went for our ultrasound and our little one's heart was beating away at 129 bpm, and baby was moving around.  I felt better when I woke up, but then quickly realized that it would be way too early for little one to look like a baby and be moving around.  That got me started worrying again.

I think R is starting to believe that this is actually happening.  He commented yesterday that there were two of us next to him in the car.  At that point, it dawned on me that I keep flip flopping between feeling hopeful and positive about this pregnancy and totally detached, like it isn't real.  I know from talking to other ladies in my position that these are common feeling, but I really don't like them.  I know I will feel better when we have our next ultrasound.  Unfortunately that is 6 days away, and 4 of those days I am on vacation with no work to distract me.  In fact, I will be sitting in the middle of the woods with little to do except think.

Wish me luck!

- J

Big Announcement!

Yesterday we went up to Bellingham to celebrate Mom's birthday.  The plan was to surprise Mom, Dad and Sig with our big announcement, but I was nervous because the night before, Mom had mentioned having a dream about me having a little girl.  I was hoping that I would be able to keep the secret until Sig arrived.

We got there between 12:00 and 1:00, and we had to wait until Sig got there at 3:00-ish.  Luckily, R and I had a lot to get done and we were able to keep ourselves distracted.  We both went with Mom to get a new gas tank for the grill.  That ended up being a huge project, as the gas tank fitting on the grill weren't compatible.  R and Mom went back to the hardware store and swapped out the tank again, but ended up having the same problem.  We got it working for a few minutes, but then it stopped working again.  We also had to take apart the crib, and I had to bake Mom's cake.  In the meantime, we had lots of surprise visitors.  Mom's aunt and uncle came by to wish Mom a happy birthday, and Dad's former caregiver stopped by as well. 

Finally, Sig arrived.  Unfortunately, she showed up while Dad's former caregiver was there, so we had to wait until she left to give the gift bags.  As soon as she walked out the door, I gave Mom and Sig their gift bags.  In each was a Grandma's Handbook with a copy of the ultrasound photo in it.  I also included a picture book for each bag.  Mom's was "The Berenstein Bears and a Week at Grandma's".  Sig's was "Just Grandma and Me (A Little Critter book)".  And I slid a "I love Grandpa" bib in Mom's so that Dad wouldn't feel left out.  Sig was the first one to guess, which I found a little surprising considering Mom's dream.  Everyone was thrilled.  And more importantly, everyone agreed to not say anything until we are ready.

So everything went really well and it is so much easier now that we don't have to hide anything from our parents.  

- J

Introducing our Little One!

Here is the very first picture of our little darling.

All you can see is the gestational sac, but that is exactly what you should see at 5 weeks.  In fact, little one is measuring exactly on track.  And, there are no bleeds in my uterus, my tubes look good, and it looks like I ovulated from the right side.  Everything looks textbook right now.

I got a chance to meet with the doctor as well.  She said that I will stay with her practice until I am at least 10 weeks along or until my OB wants me back.  She said that I should stop the progesterone and Metformin between 10 and 12 weeks, but when I mentioned that I would feel better staying on them until I am past the point where I lost Hannah and Liam, she said that was fine.  She did say that I am going to stay on the baby aspirin and the Lovenox for a long time to come.  Finally, she said that any time I was feeling anxious, I was welcome to come back in for a check.

Today has been such a wonderful day.  I am absolutely floating on air today.  We are all set to tell our parents tomorrow.  And now I have pictures I can give them as well.

- J

5 Weeks!

I am 5 weeks along today! That puts me 1/8 of the way through this pregnancy. Every week that I get to check off without a problem is an absolute blessing.

I get to go in for an even earlier ultrasound tomorrow! I called my RE's office yesterday and explained how anxious I was. They said that given my history, I could come in tomorrow, as long as I understood that it would be too early to see a heartbeat yet. I am absolutely okay with that if it means that I get to see my little one. And I get to keep the appointment on the 31st! Fingers crossed that everything goes well tomorrow.

Weekly Check In:

• How far along?: 5 weeks

• Total weight gain: Haven't been weighed yet. We'll see if they weigh me tomorrow.

• How big is baby?: Little one is the size of an appleseed today!

• Maternity clothes?: I have started wearing some transitional pieces, not because I have a bump but because my bloat is that bad.

• Movement: Way too early.

• Stretch marks?: Just the ones I already had.

• Sleep?: I have been sleeping better, although I am going to bed at 8:30 or 9:00 and waking up at 4:00 am. I don't seem to be tossing and turning quite as much. I am exhausted again about an hour after I wake up though.

• Symptoms?: Exhausted, heartburn, heightened sense of smell, frequent urination, gassy, constipated, very mild nausea, and really vivid dreams.  I am still loving each and every symptom.

• Food cravings:  Fruit and veggies are still sounding fantastic at this point. I am finding that any soy product other than soy milk is making me nauseous, which makes life difficult with my food allergies.

• Belly button in or out?: Still an innie.

• What I miss: The only thing I miss at this point is energy and the ability to go to bed at 11:00 like a decent 29 year old.

• What I'm looking forward to: I can't wait for my ultrasound tomorrow. And as long as everything goes well, we will be telling our parents on Saturday.

• Best Moment this week: Taking a digital test and seeing the word "Pregnant" come up. That and getting my third beta results.

• Milestone: This week, little one's kidneys, liver and nerves are forming, as are the buds for it's arms and legs. Little one's spine has formed, and it's heart will start beating within the next week, although it is still too early to pick up on an ultrasound. 

- J